1. The inconspicuous exchange of cash and bottles of vodka outside the liquor store with the 21-year-old who offered to buy you booze. You hand him a $50. He hands you a brown bag filled with three handles. And then you both go on your merry way.
2. Smuggling alcohol into your college dorm room. “Oh no, I don’t need help carrying my bag inside. I was just studying at the library for hours and had to lug all my textbooks over there. That clinking noise? Must just be my textbooks and laptop making a silly noise. BYE!”
3. Scavenging enough cash to pay for your first fake ID. “It’s going to cost how much for this? $150?! And you’re going to need this in cash by tomorrow? It’s time to start thinking of a legitimate excuse for this missing money to tell my parents now…”
4. Hiding your giddy excitement when you go to dinner with your parents, order drinks and aren’t questioned or carded. You just feel so grown-up and cool and like a real adult when you can casually order a beer at dinner. Damn, this sure is the freaking life.
5. Not knowing what to order when you actually do go to a bar. Can’t they at least provide some sort of menu? I don’t know what I like or what’s good or what the house speciality even is. The bartender just looks at me like I know everything! I guess I’ll just play it safe and get a vodka cranberry.
6. The heart wrenching moment when you attempt to use your fake ID at a legit bar and get it taken away. Well, that’s $70 down the drain.
7. When your significant other is already 21 and you are not. You and all his friends are pregaming for your big night out. Yet deep down inside, you know there’s only a 10 percent chance you’re actually going to get into that bar they’re planning on going to. Ultimately, you’ll get rejected and go eat some pizza with your bae while everyone else drinks the night away. Sigh.
8. The pounding anxiety you feel each time you hand your fake to the guy at the liquor store—no matter how many times you’ve already bought from him. Act natural, act natural. Flip your hair like you don’t care. Give him a nice smile too, but don’t act like you’re trying too hard. Phew, he handed it back to me. Good to go!
9. Flirting with the bouncer and pushing up your boobs in order to get into the bar. If all else fails, this is the go-to method for every girl. Wear your highest heels, your best bra and flutter those eyelashes, ladies.
10. The burning envy you feel each time one of your friends turns 21. Great. Now just one more friend who will inevitably ditch me for the bars. Will my time to turn 21 ever come?!?